In part one and part two of this article, I discussed my early experiences of emotional abuse from my husband, including gaslighting and economic abuse–as well as my multiple thwarted attempts to leave the relationship. I disregarded a lot of awful things my husband did, such as him being mean and abusive to my oldest…
Broken Vows: Emotional Abuse in Intimate Partnerships (part 2)
In part one of this article, I discussed the different ways that my husband has emotionally abused me over the course of our relationship, including his attempts to completely isolate me. The scariest part to me now is the fact that if he had ever accomplished his goal of completing isolating me, he would’ve become…
Broken Vows: Emotional Abuse in Intimate Partnerships (part 1)
Let me start by saying this is the hardest and longest article I’ve ever had to write, but writing for me is therapeutic. I have been in an abusive relationship for five years. At first glance, my husband checks all the boxes of a perfect partner. He’s handsome and charming, and in the beginning, he…
Improving Empathy
Sometimes, people are so caught up in their day-to-day lives that they lose a crucial part of themselves, something many people might call “empathy.” Empathy doesn’t just measure how much you care for others – it encapsulates an ability to navigate a variety of social cues. For example, being able to read someone’s facial expressions…
Edging Sexual Norms
Recently, I presented information on a group program, entitled “Edging Sexual Norms,” and a person thought this meant I was supporting pedophiles. It concerned me that this person was connecting an abusive sexual behavior such as pedophilia with the consensual non-normative sexuality of adults that is discussed in my program. I assume that others may…
“Don’t Be Hysterical” – The History of Sexism in Psychological Treatment
We as human beings would like to think that our beliefs and actions are founded in reality and logic. While we have made mistakes as a species, we often see these as temporary blips in the grand scheme of history: sure, our psychological theories and treatment of women was sexist and not based on any…
When Grief Becomes Complicated
First, there was my father. I made the three hour round trip to the hospital several times a week for months just to sit with him. I watched his blue eyes fade and his complexion turn to ash as he slowly slipped away. One bright October morning, at 80 years of age, he died of…
New Year, New You
The New Year is a time of natural reflection and goal setting. Frequently, people seek to begin therapy around the New Year because they are motivated to improve their lives, or because the holidays just wrapped up and family members have encouraged them to make changes. While we do not need a new year or…
CODEPENDENT BEHAVIOR: What it is, how to spot it, and what to do about it
I had my fair share of unhealthy relationships. I’ve been in both positions during breakups: The one who did everything in their power to keep the relationship going, and the one who pushed the other person away out of fear. I have allowed my insecurities to get the best of me, and I have hurt…